Just Let L.A. Float Away

Yesterday my esteemed colleague and the purveyor of this site responded to an L.A. Times article written about the attendance of the OSU Spring Game. Now let me preface this by saying that I am, of course, a Michigan fan. But don’t allow that to stop you from reading this glorious rhetoric nonetheless.

Normally, I would be glad to see an opponent kick sand in the face of every poisonous nut on the planet, but Chris Dufresne’s article was the worst drivel I’ve read in ages and yet again makes us question how very far sports writing has fallen. The basic premise behind this article was that Ohio State fans have absolutely nothing to do in their lives but go to the Spring Game because outside of that, there’s nothing but field plowing and taking your sister out on a date available to them. On the other hand, glorious Southern California is so littered with magnificence that they just have too much going on in their awesome lives to stop and support their football teams. Mr. Dufresne is then kind enough to inform us that they are true fans since their butts are in the seats when it really counts. (obligatory reference to the OSU-USC game of ‘08).

Here’s why I take issue with that: He’s trying to take an exceptional, record-breaking thing (one that I, as a Wolverine, would be most happy to possess) and turn it into nothing in an effort to reassure his readers that they’re not bad fans, they’re just cooler than the rest of us. Yes, a sports writer who asserts that he and his readers are too cool for sports.

Ultimately, his point (like his spelling and grammar) quickly loses footing when you look at the facts.

The first point that completely exposes the sadness of the SoCal fanaticism was mentioned very clearly by my associate. Los Angeles County alone has approximately 10 million people, most of whom I can assume were NOT at the beach. That point in mind, they couldn’t muster any more than 20k people to watch a consistent national championship contending team go out their for their warm ups? Seriously? Is Frisbee Golf THAT time consuming?

The second point that’s even worse is based off of the assumption that the SoCal fans are there when it counts. They’re not and that’s just a plain fact. During the season, USC barely cracks 90% attendance and UCLA does even worse, eeking in just about 80% attendance. TEN MILLION PEOPLE and you can’t even get to capacity? Are you serious?

Mr. Dufresne, the reason Ohio State fills up the Horseshoe and Michigan gets 50k people to show up to a spring game after suffering it’s worst season in history is because these are fans that actually give a crap about these teams and these schools. These schools are part of how we grew up, part of childhood memories and where we came from. A school like USC buys it’s history. Half of the reason USC gets athletes is because of climate and girls. You can try using the “exceptional educational opportunity” line, but when you barely graduate 50% of your football players, it’s not really a valid point.

In the end, the true college football fans from around the country who actually support their teams IN SPITE of the fact that we could be doing other things would like to request that you put your roller skates back on, head back to The ‘Bu and the next time you have an ingenious brain fart to write about sports, write it in the sand and let the mighty Pacific wash it away.